I think that after the service everything really hit me. I entered a stage of grieving where I became angry at everyone, I took everything wrong and to heart. It felt like being a teenager again. I had an 8 hour panic attack the day after. I couldn't calm down. The two weeks following have been my own personal hell. I have been fighting with everyone and cant seem to find my forgiveness. My counselor assures me that I am allowed to feel this way, I have been reading this book on grieving that has been helping me understand why I am going through these different stages. As I am writing this on mother's day I am struggling a bit.
Luckily, Danny is so patient when I get crazy. We started running, and I can't tell you how much that has helped. Not just my cognitive abilities but my fitness and mood are all soaring above where they have been since before Christmas. Danny is a genius.
All of the girls have picked their bridesmaid dresses. They all look spectacular. We also hit the 6 month mark. We have been settling a lot of little things lately. Mainly about parties and clothing. Though I am getting excited this is a lot more work than I ever expected. Which is why we wanted a casual small wedding. I know it will be a lovely time it has just gotten so much bigger than we ever planned. Most of the invites are addressed and we are just waiting on the postage to make it in.  |
| Our toasting champagne flutes came in |
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| This is part of the centerpieces, they will surround the chalkboard wine bottles. |
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